Surrogates

I know it’s not a bag of shit, but it’s still a bag. No? Look how pretty it is in the street, in the sunshine. All there by itself, quiet, just like the bag of shit. You don’t like it? But why don’t you like it, it’s still a bag after all. Come on! Don’t be like that, praise this black leather bag. Enjoy it. What do you mean it’s not the same? You want the ‘real thing’? It’s got no character? It’s got no poo? It’s got no poo. Yeah, it’s got no poo. That’s true. But wait, it may have some inside and you don’t know. You’d be surprised by how many are full of shit! Really, many many. It’s astonishing. Ok but you still prefer bag of shit. At least you know what you’re getting. It’s shit. But you know that. It’s all there to be seen, no surprises. Fine. So you’d rather have no bag at all if you can’t have bag of shit? I understand. That’s fair enough.